Expectations and Peace of Mind

How do we set reasonable expectation for ourselves? The spectrum goes from “have no expectations and you will never be disappointed” to “aim high” or “you have nothing to lose.” For me, wellness means peace of mind and my expectations are directly proportional to my peace of mind.

 Trying to do things perfectly is a sure path to being unreasonable. Realize you are less than perfect. Once you can accept that, you will begin to be less demanding on yourself and you will cut some slack for others.

 I have expectations for what has proven to work in the past. These are a few examples:

  • “If I take one of Jessa’s classes, I will sweat and have a great workout.”
  • “My morning cup of coffee will help me be more alert.” 
  • “When I eat well, I feel well.”

 Expectations that others have for you can be tricky to navigate through. Yes, your boss can expect you to show up to work on time and get your work done in a timely manner. This can be done because it has been communicated to you. Clear communication is the key to other peoples’ expectations for you. It is your responsibility how to respond. 


Being mindful of expectations that have a time frame can set you up for unrealistic expectations. Taking responsibility and re-evaluating a different time period will help you obtain your goal and get you back on track. 

Set boundaries. It is perfectly o.k. to do less than possible. Here is a tool you can use. If someone asks for your help with something, ask questions back about their timeline. Let them know you will think about it and get back to them. For instance you might say “I can’t give you an answer now, but I will get back to you tomorrow.”  Give yourself the gift of time and the room for perspective.  


Recap of Tools to use

-Be mindful of expectations

-Set boundaries

-Ask questions back about timelines

-Clearly communicate

-Give yourself the gift of time


Be Well,

Julie Feuerborn

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